When we think of the Hollywood Foreign Press Association (HFPA) and its annual televised Golden Globes ceremony, we think of class, dignity, decorum, integrity and above all, sobriety.
Also: It's Opposite Day.
As co-hosts Tina Fey and Amy Poehler look to follow in Ricky Gervais' wake at the 70th Annual Golden Globe Awards this Sunday, January 13, we take a look back at the over-the-top milestones of shocking behavior we've come to expect from our beloved Globes.
1. The Rat Pack Takes Over, Baby
Though the Golden Globe Awards began in 1944, the statues were given out exclusively by journalists (zzzzzzzzzzzzz) until 1958. Then, in a moment of drunken history, the core of the Rat Pack (Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, Sammy Davis Jr.) stormed the stage and hijacked the show to the delight of the (let's be fair, equally soused) audience. The trio was invited back the next year and got this whole swingin' shindig started, man. Ain't that a kick in the head?
2. Bette Midler Makes An Obvious Pun
She was quoting Joan Crawford, but Midler will be forever branded with having made the tacky decision to compare the word "Globes" to her own chesticles. Yes, Bette, we've all thought that. Bravo. After accepting the 1980 Best Actress trophy for "The Rose," she took things into even tackier territory when she used her statue to simulate … well, see for yourself (if you dare).
3. Pia Zadora Is the Worst Best Actress
The Beatles said money can't buy you love, but turns out it can procure a Golden Globe. Meshulam Riklis was the mega-wealthy Israeli business tycoon who invented junk bonds, and Pia Zadora (30 years his junior) was the lovely young ingenue who won his heart. He financed the incest drama "Butterfly" as an acting vehicle for her, then courted members of the HFPA into giving her the Best Female Newcomer award over Elizabeth McGovern and Kathleen Turner. She later won Razzies for Worst Actress and Worst New Star.
4. Jim Carrey Is the Butt of His Own Joke
Since "The Truman Show," Jim Carrey has proven himself a worthy dramatic performer in films like "Man On The Moon" and "Eternal Sunshine." However, back in 1998, the fact that the guy who made "Ahhhhh yah yah yah yah yah yalrighty then!" a catchphrase could actually act was a revelation. In his acceptance speech he made light of that with unexpected candor, then brought it home with heartfelt earnestness.
5. Elizabeth Taylor Drunk
That really sums it up, doesn't it? They say you shouldn't speak ill of the dead, but you also shouldn't get ill before presenting in front of 200 million people. Apparently no one told this to Taylor, or perhaps by this point those weren't her original ears anymore. Welcome to Slur City, population: 1 Hollywood icon.
6. Renee Zellweger: When Nature Calls
Tom Cruise had her at "Hello," but even "And the winner is …" wasn't enough for Hugh Grant to win over his "Bridget Jones" costar when she nabbed a surprise win for "Nurse Betty." Where was she? In the loo, as Jones would say, wiping some lipstick smudge off her teeth so she wouldn't look stupid on national television. (She wasn't the first to be in the bathroom when her name was called - Christine Lahti was similarly occupied when she won a Best Actress Globe for "Chicago Hope" in 1998.) The best laid plans ...
7. Scarlett Johansson Gets Groped
Oh ScarJo, where would you be without those knockers? Don't get us wrong, the girl's a mighty fine actress, but her assets are surefire attention grabbers. (See a couple of years ago when her nude photos drew the media to African famine.) Fashionista Isaac Mizrahi grabbed more than just attention when he used a red carpet interview at the 2006 Globes as gleeful pretense to cop a feel, which commentators claim he got away with because he's gay. What a handful!
8. Robert De Niro Gives Most Awkward Speech Ever
Although De Niro is one of our greatest actors -- a chameleon, even -- he didn't realize that just because he shared the screen with Don Rickles in "Casino" doesn't mean he became Don Rickles. When the actor trotted out wisecracks about Javier Bardem being deported or paying for his kids' private schools (which would have been stale in the vaudeville era) he went from "Raging Bull" to "Whining Jackass."
9. Ricky Gervais Scientology Brouhaha
Sure, in his first time hosting Gervais drew heat for making light of Mel Gibson's alcoholism, but in Year Two, England's most incendiary export to America since gunpowder literally made the audience gasp. We have no idea whom he might be referring to, but making comments like this can be risky business. Maybe Gervais came down with a case of Saturday Night Fever?