Ben Affleck and writer-director Kevin Smith go way, way back (it's almost Matt Damon status, ya'll) to the days of "Mallrats" and "Chasing Amy" and such. Affleck starred in a half dozen of the guy's movies, and Smith in turn helped produce the eventual Oscar-winning and career-jettisoning "Good Will Hunting." So, they're pretty old school bros.
And Kevin Smith's a super-geek when it comes to all things comic books, so of course he had some amazing things to say about the fact that his long-time pal will become the Batman for Zack Snyder's "Man of Steel" sequel, tentatively referred to as "Batman Vs. Superman." To put it mildly, he was pretty excited about the news.
5. He was Pleasantly Surprised by the News
"If this was the '90s you know I'd be cast as The Penguin, man," he exclaimed during his Hollywood Babble-on show in New York City's Gotham Comedy Club. "[This is] one of the greatest things ever happened to me and I didn't see this one f**king comin' a mile away. I do a f**king show called 'Fat Man on Batman.' In addition to that, I spent twelve years working with the f**king dude and I could never put two and two together and see that one glorious day Batman would be one of my closest friends ... This is the greatest thing that ever happened, man, a dude I know ... It's f**kin' Batfleck, dude."
Well that's a tad more enthusiastic of a take on the news than what the Damon offered up.
4. He Thinks Affleck is Right for the Role
"He's got a Batman chin, and he looks exactly like Bruce Wayne. He's got the c**k of Batman, he's down to here I'll tell you that much. I've seen Batman's dick!" he joked ... or did he?
"I'm all for this idea. I think it's great," he said more seriously. "I didn't see it coming, I had no f**king clue, but I'm happy! I've been on record many times saying I think Ben Affleck can be anything he wants. He can act in anything. I think he's an amazing actor. I said he could even play the shark in a 'Jaws' remake."
3. Affleck's Previous Fail as a Superhero Doesn't Faze Him
Smith offered up some insider info as to what exactly happened with that widely loathed stinker: "This dude has loved Batman going as far back as I can remember. He only did f**kin' 'Daredevil' because he loved Frank Miller's 'Dark Knight Returns' and he's like 'They're never gonna make another Batman' 'cause it was after Batman had nipples and s**t like that," he explained. "So, he was 'Daredevil's cool. I mean, Miller wrote him as well ... so it was always rooted in Batman."
2. Haters Just Don't Understand
"He's always been into the notion. He'll honor the character. I honestly think he's a great actor. It makes absolute sense. A lot of people are like 'He's gonna f*** it up like Val Kilmer or [George] Clooney. Bull sh*t man. This dude has been to the bottom, okay? He's been in Kevin Smith pictures. He knows what it's like to be, you know, he got kicked around for a couple of years ... then he crawled himself back to respectability and s**t. His movie ["Argo"] won best picture just this year, so this is a dude who's been to the bottom, then to the top."
"I know him," he said. "I don't think he's looking for a return to the bottom. He's a strategic mother f**ker, so I think for him, he's like 'No, this is a smart move. I'm not directing it. I'm in it.'"
Cue the on-point sound clip from "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back" ("This is a site populated by militant movie buffs, sad pathetic little bastards living in their parents' basement, downloading scripts and what they think is the inside information about movies and actors they claim to despise yet can't stop discussing"). Boom!
1. He Thinks Affleck Won't Mess it Up
"I'm telling you, he will not drop the f**king ball," Smith said plainly.