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6 Glaring Differences Between Taylor Lautner's 'Abduction' Dude and Jacob Black

Taylor Lautner in Abduction
Lionsgate

This is the moment Team Jacob has been anticipating since meeting Taylor Lautner in 2008. The little guy has grown up and flown out of the "Twilight" nest on his own two wings, a.k.a. sexy wolf abs (yes, a straight male Twi-Hard can still comment on the amazingness or attractiveness of another man's abs). Lautner has landed pretty much where we expected, in action films (it was either that or take the Chris Klein route... wise choice, T.Laut).

In his new film "Abduction," our wolf pup plays Nathan, shouldering the weight of leading man status for the first time, and shows us a new side to him. There are certainly similarities between between the characters Nathan and Jacob: they both ride motorcycles, both make low growls while fighting and both are painfully awkward when interacting with the opposite sex.

On the other hand, there are many more differences between them. Here are the six most glaring contrasts between Lautner's "Abduction" dude Nathan and Jacob Black.

1. He's Not Native-American

Summit

This does not mean that Taylor Lautner looks any less Native-American than he does in "The Twilight Saga." Strange though, that in "Abduction," there is no mention of Nathan's ethnicity. Not even when he learns that his Scandinavian-looking parents aren't his biological parents does he say, "I always wondered why I looked so different."

Both Nathan and Jacob do seem to prefer dating white chicks, though.

2. He Gets Totally Wasted

Whether it's because of Stephenie Meyer's Mormon background or not, alcohol doesn't come up very often in the "Twilight" series -- so we don't know if the Wolf Pack can out beer-bong regular humans. Nathan, however, loves to party and seems to have a fairly low tolerance for booze. He passes out on the lawn of a party, with his shirt off ... naturally.

3. He Keeps His Shirt On (for the Most Part)

Nathan is much more modest than Jacob and only takes his shirt off when drunk or when quickly changing into a new shirt. He's on the wrestling team, but doesn't even wear a singlet during his match -- he wears gym clothes. Twi-Hards of the female persuasion may get sexually-frustrated with the lack of Lautner abs in the movie (come on, it's called "AB-duction"!) and may have to watch the "Eclipse" DVD at home afterwards.

4. He Does Parkour

Abduction
Lionsgate

You know the French sport of running and jumping off embankments and walls in the city? It's okay if you don't because Jacob certainly wouldn't have any know -- he just turns into a wolf when he wants to run (and he hates the French). Not to state the obvious, but Nathan is not a wolf, so when he needs to run away from someone, he used fancy parkour moves to get through crowds and around obstacles.

5. He's Trained In MMA

As impressive as it is to see a CGI-animated wolf fight a vampire, Nathan's mixed martial arts moves are even more stellar. I didn't know Lautner could fight like Jason Bourne (sans the weird slapping moves). As much fighting as there is in "Abduction," you'll want to see way more. Really, the entire movie should be re-edited into one long fight sequence and a few motorcycles rides.

6. He's a Fan of the Steelers, Pirates And My Morning Jacket

We don't really know what Jacob listens to -- do werewolves even listen to music? Ah yes, I just remembered "Teen Wolf" and "Surfin' USA." But I digress. 

While we don't see Nathan listening to any music, he does have a My Morning Jacket poster hanging on his bedroom wall. So he's gotta really dig them. He also lives in Pittsburg, so of course, he's a Steelers and Pirates fan until he dies. There is a "Terrible Towel" in his bedroom and the movie ends at a Pirates game. That means you'd never want to watch sports with Nathan, because from my experience, Pittsburg fans are the second worst after Philadelphia fans.

(I love you, Pennsylvania. I'm just afraid of your sports fans.)

Confessions of a (Male) Twi-Hard is a “Twilight” humor column by Ryan McKee that publishes every other week on NextMovie. Read Ryan’s introductory post here and follow him on Twitter.

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