In the current two-horse race to bring Snow White to the iPod generation, Universal's "Snow White and the Huntsman" is bringing up the rear but gaining fast as it casts its Seven Dwarfs.
Common wisdom dictates that bigger is badder, but these days when you want a big screen hero it's best to think small. Thus, some of England's most diminutive thesps are ditching their platform shoes and looking at mortgage rates for a tiny cottage.
According to Heat Vision, these actors include Bob Hoskins (5' 5½") as a blind dwarf named Constantine, Toby Jones (5' 5") as timid dwarf Claudius, and Eddie Izzard (5' 7") as Tiberius, the "biggest and burliest of the crew." Whether or not Izzard will appear in drag and do James Mason impersonations in the film had not been revealed at press time.
As we revealed yesterday, Blackbeard himself Ian McShane has already been cast as the leader dwarf, Caesar, while "Sherlock Holmes" co-star Eddie Marsan (5' 8½") and McShane's "Pirates" shipmate Stephen Graham (5' 5") are also in talks.
Tarsem Singh's currently lensing rival "Snow White" film with Julia Roberts is going the "Time Bandits" route and casting actual, bonafide little people, so we wonder if "Huntsman" director Rupert Sanders will use computers to make titular stars Kristen Stewart and Chris Hemsworth bigger or if a booster seat is all that's necessary with Hoskins and Co.?
Also, while we'd like to imagine that there's a story-specific reason for all dwarfs to be named after Roman emperors, "because it sounds cool" is reason enough for us.