You may remember a few weeks ago when French actor Gerard Depardieu got himself kicked off a plane for, ahem, relieving himself in the aisle. Classy.
Defending his actions, the actor took to the television waves to explain his side of the story—which can basically be summed up in his statement, "I am an elephant… I have a lot of pee."
According to the Daily Mail, Depardieu claimed that he was desperate to use the facilities when his plane from Paris to Dublin was still sitting on the runway, but a flight attendant blocked the door and ordered him back to his seat. Depardieu didn't "understand why she blocked the door."
Maybe because the plane was sitting on an active runway? (Just a guess.)
In any case, the resourceful star borrowed an empty water bottle from his friend, fellow actor Edouard Baer and, uh, got down to business. But then the bottle overflowed, and his problems went from bad to worse.
Though he claims that he offered to clean it up, the staff took care of it—delaying the plane another two hours. That must have been a lot of pee. When they reboarded the plane, Depardieu was asked if he had been drinking, and was not allowed back on board. He claims to have been sober at the time.
We're not sure if that makes this story better or worse.