In my last column, I wrote about 10 celebrity "Twilight" fans and how they have declared their love in public. Well, today takes a different turn. Let's head over to the dark side and out the celebrity "Twilight" haters.
Just yesterday, George Takei, voice actor extraordinaire and Hikaru Sulu in the "Star Trek" series, released a YouTube video urging "Star Trek" and "Star Wars" fans to put aside their differences and turn their attention toward hating "Twilight." While it's tongue-in-cheek and clearly an attempt to keep this 72-year-old actor's name in the media (mission accomplished), the vitriol he spews on our favorite vampire series seems to come from a very real place.
"Gone is any sense of heroism, camaraderie or epic battle. In its place we have vampires that sparkle, moan and go to high school," Takei says. "Sci-fi fans be warned, there are no great stories, characters or profound life lessons to be found in 'Twilight' ... In 'Twilight,' the only message that rings through loud and clear is: 'Does my boyfriend like me?'"
Whether he was being serious or not, Takei isn't the only public figure to bash "Twilight." Plenty of others feel the need to do so and have secured a spot on my enemies list, which is getting longer than Nixon's (you can make my enemies list for reasons other than "Twilight," too, like if you skimp on my frozen yogurt toppings).
Like vampires themselves, vampire authors don't all stick together. Anne Rice, known for her series "The Vampire Chronicles," which gave us Tom Cruise and Brad Pitt as vampires in "Interview with the Vampire," stuck a stake right through Twi-hards' hearts this October.
Prompted by the question "Should vampires sparkle?" Rice responded on Facebook that Louis and Lestat "would never hurt immortals who choose to spend eternity going to high school over and over again in a small town – any more than they would hurt the physically disabled or the mentally challenged." What? She's calling the Cullens retarded? She added, "My vampires possess gravitas. They can afford to be merciful."
I know she has a ton of money already, but that was a stupid move. At some point, many young "Twilight" readers would have graduated to her books and she'd enjoy a revival. Not now.
The king of horror fiction came down off his throne to pass judgment on Stephenie Meyer's writing. In 2009, when the "Twilight" craze was just starting to churn, Stephen King was asked to compare Meyer with "Harry Potter" author J.K. Rowling.
He answered, "The real difference is that Jo Rowling is a terrific writer and Stephenie Meyer can’t write worth a darn. She’s not very good."
Damn, man! Don't mince words. Tell us what you really think.
If there is anyone that we should trust on tastemaking, it's former star of "The Hills" and "The City" Whitney Port. You realize that last sentence is dripping with sarcasm, right? In 2009, Port told MTV News that she'd seen "Twilight" and didn't understand what all of the hype was about.
"I haven't read the books, but I saw the movie," she said. "I thought the movie was really bad. I love whatever his name is ... Robert [Pattinson]. I think he's so good-looking and handsome. I haven't met him."
I bet you know his name now! And I bet he has no idea who you are, Ms. Port.
A repeated offender when it comes to "Twilight" bashing, Miley Cyrus has been taking pot shots at the series for the last two years.
In 2009, when asked about the movie, she replied, "I don’t believe in it. I don’t like vampires, I don’t like the wolf that pops out of the screen when I’m watching TV at night. I don’t want anything to do with it. I don’t like the shirts, I don’t like any of it.”
Did she begin by saying she doesn't "believe" in "Twilight"? Even if she doesn't like it, she does realize it's an actual thing, right?
Later that same year, when asked about Twi-hards, this "wordsmith" picked some choice critique again. “I think it’s like [a] cult ... I think it’s a cult. I think it’s bad. I think it’s like, just people get too into it." I'm sure you like the thousands and thousands of cultish fans who show up to your concerts, Miley.
And because the press loves to bait her, Miley said this last year about R.Pattz and Lautner: "I’d rather keep the dead and revolting things like vampires and werewolves out of my life."
That is a lot of hate for a pothead. Maybe she needs to give the movies another shot? This time with a bigger bong.