"Fastest and Furioustest"? "Fast and Furious' Excellent Adventure"? "Live Fast Or Die Furious"? "F6ST"?
Sorry, we just can't help ourselves trying to come up with new iterations for the next, now-inevitable "Fast and the Furious" installment title.
"Furious Six," or whatever it will be called, is now a foregone conclusion thanks to America's insatiable appetite for burly dudes in tight t-shirts driving above the recommended speed limit.
Series director Justin Lin has confirmed as much to USA Today after "Fast Five" took in $83.6 million, making it the highest grossing April opening and the biggest opening of all-time for Universal Pictures.
"After this big weekend, we're going forward," said Lin. "It's pretty much 100 percent. It's going to happen. At five, we're just hitting our stride. We're growing. People want to continue this journey."
Seeing Rio de Janeiro's Christ the Redeemer statue in the "Fast Five" trailer makes us think that a little religion wouldn't hurt those grosses.
"And On the 6th Day God Created Furious"…?
Lin, who is also circling the next "Terminator" behemoth, did confirm that they have outstayed their welcome in Brazil, and will be "going elsewhere" for part six.
Okay, okay, please Mr. Diesel, Mr. Walker, Mr. Rock, just hear us out: how about a London-set, Christmas-themed sequel?
"6 Geese-a-Laying, 5 Gold Rings, 4 Colly Birds, 3 French Hens, 2 Turtle Doves, and a Fast in a Fur-i-ous."
