We love our mothers. We wouldn't be here without them. As the years tick by, we become grateful for all the stuff that Mom bugged us about at the time – eating our vegetables, not sitting too close to the television, wearing warm clothes, paying attention in school, etc.
But sometimes, we wish our moms were a little cooler, and more like the ones we see in movies. Our moms grounded us for calling people names and wouldn't let us go to concerts. Movie moms fought killer robots, let their sons tour with rock bands... Our moms freaked out if we got home late, but movie moms are just glad you survived your fight with an evil wizard or supervillain.
So, in honor of Mother's Day, here are nine movie moms we'd like to have. We love you, Mom. We really do. But we can't help but love everything about these mommies, too.
9. Esme Cullen (Elizabeth Reaser), 'The Twilight Saga' (2008-2012)
Most wouldn't want a vampire as a mom, but they might make an exception if they met Esme Cullen. Sure, she gets a little crazy if she smells blood, but for the most part she's warm, generous, loving, and welcoming, even if you're a human girl dating her favorite son. Once you're in her family, she'll do anything for you, even go to war against vampires and werewolves or babysit your half-breed baby. Oh, and she enjoys baseball, art, and home decorating. She's a pretty normal mom, really, except for the whole immortality and blood-drinking.
8. Helen Incredible (Holly Hunter), 'The Incredibles' (2004)
Having a superhero for a parent is a scary prospect. What if Mom's superpower was reading thoughts? Being invisible? Shape-shifting? You'd never be safe! If they were on a superhero team, they'd probably be even stricter than a regular mom because everything would be about truth and justice. But there is one superheroine we'd like to adopt us: Mrs. Helen Incredible, a.k.a. Elastigirl. She's funny, she's smart, she's supportive and understanding of her superkids, and she can fly a plane. Most importantly, her superpower is elasticity, which can't be used to discover who we're dating or whether or not we've done our chores before playing XBOX. It's just handy.
7. Mrs. Gump (Sally Field), 'Forrest Gump' (1994)
It doesn't matter what you look like or what your IQ is, Mama Gump will love and defend you unconditionally. She'll do anything for you, even unspeakable things with your school principal. Sure, she speaks in goofy slogans, but she always has a happy spin on everything, even leg braces and unfortunate ancestors. Of all the moms on our list, she may be the closest one to a Jedi Master, since she calmly believes everyone – even Forrest – will discover their own destiny in time. No matter how upset you were about something, she would know the right thing to say.
6. Elaine Miller (Frances McDormand), 'Almost Famous' (2000)
It's a given that moms don't like or approve of the music that you listen to, and Elaine Miller in "Almost Famous" is certainly no exception. She's a straight-laced college professor who frowns on rock music, but she doesn't ban it, and she lets her son go to Black Sabbath. Though she desperately wants him to be a lawyer, she recognizes that he loves music, and allows him to accept an assignment with Rolling Stone to tour with the rock band Stillwater. All she asks is that he check in and never do drugs. Sure, she puts the verbal smack-down on Stillwater and the Band-Aids, but she never freaks out and brings him home. Too good to be true? Hardly. She's based on director Cameron Crowe's real mom.
5. Jack (Michael Keaton), 'Mr. Mom' (1983)
Sometimes, the best moms aren't moms, they're dads. Michael Keaton proved to be the perfect parental blend in "Mr. Mom." He mixed a dad's messy cool with a mom's strict rules, and with a healthy sense of humor. He fought the family vacuum cleaner, he learned how to cook, he developed a healthy fondness for kid's tv shows, and he was gentle about his son's obsessive attachment to a blanket. He punched out mean bosses, and was confident enough in his masculinity to hang out with neighborhood moms at the strip club. We'd be happy with a dad secure enough to be called a mom, and who had such a great sense of humor about our crazy, unconventional family life.
4. Bren MacGuff (Allison Janney), 'Juno' (2007)
No mom (or stepmom, for that matter) wants to deal with a pregnant teenage daughter. But Bren MacGuff handles Juno's news with tranquility and humor, which makes us think she would handle just about everything – wrecked your car, flunked a test, dropped out of college – with calm. She doesn't abandon Juno in any time of need, either, and tears into ultrasound techs and doctors with the bite only a mother can deliver. If we can't get Sarah Connor or Mrs. Incredible in a time of crisis, we'll settle for Bren.
3. Rosemary Penderghast (Patricia Clarkson), 'Easy A' (2010)
Many of us have moms that are easy to talk to. Few of us have moms as relaxed and witty about everything as "Easy A'"s Olive Penderghast (Emma Stone). Mama Penderghast laughs about Olive getting detention, barely blinks an eye when her daughter starts wearing corsets blazoned with a scarlet A, she simply shares her own torrid past. She thinks her husband is "too straight." She pretends she is a Southern lady, and makes jokes about her adopted son. Her only flaw is that she always picks "family member of the week," dooming the entire Penderghast clan to unexciting rentals from Netflix. That's a small price to pay for a mom who doesn't lecture you for discussing sex on a video blog.
2. Sarah Connor (Linda Hamilton), 'Terminator' (1984 - 1991)
Moms will always fight for their children, but no mom kicks as much butt as Sarah Connor. She's the entire heart of the "Terminator" saga. Most moms just want their kids to go to college and get a good job. Not Sarah. Her destiny is to mother, train, and protect John Connor so that he can lead the Resistance against Skynet, and be humanity's salvation. Sarah Connor is definitely not the most fun mom, but she does allow you to handle explosives and weaponry, and that beats taking out the trash. And that bully at school? Done.
1. Mrs. Molly Weasley (Julie Walters), 'Harry Potter' (2001-2011)
Sometimes, the best kind of mom is just a cuddly one, and that's Mrs. Weasley. She provides a home away from Hogwarts, the Dursleys, and Voldemort for Harry. Though she's known for delivering a Howler, spanking someone with a broomstick, or delivering a killing spell, she's pretty sweet and relaxed for a mom of seven (seven!). She's content if the house remains standing and everyone's happy, healthy, and alive. But best of all is her cooking. No matter what evil or disaster Voldemort and his Death Eaters are unleashing on the wizarding world, Mrs. Weasley always has an incredible meal waiting for her family and the Order of the Phoenix. We want her to adopt us just so we can have her onion soup, her bread, and her treacle tarts.
Originally published May 6, 2011.